User blog:Trigger Happy the Gremlin/Che and Hammurabi: Tropical Fruits!
Not Che nor Hammurabi are particularly adept at solving mysteries; therefore, the murder of Enrique has had them stumped for longer than you can say "whomst'd've'ly'yaint'nt'ed'ies's'y'es". The whole thing is plenty of food for thought; and, as such, they have decided to share their favorite fruits with you. Bananas Hammurabi is an ape (duh) so he likes bananas, right? Of course! Hammurabi loves bananas! In fact, Hammurabi is going to eat you if you don't like bananas... just kidding! We are descended from gorillas, therefore Hammurabi would be cannibalistic if he ate you. Hammurabi is not a cannibal, so spread the word! #HammurabiIsNotACannibal. Back on topic, Bananas are delicious and creamy, and grow off of palm trees. Eat as many as you can; they are full of potassium! Just be careful with the peel. Bananas are also fried/dried to make banana chips, and cooked to make banana bread! The banana heart, on the other hand, should NOT be eaten; the heart of the banana tree, I mean; bananas don't have blood, therefore a heart would be useless. Banana plants don't have blood, either, but they still have a heart; why? Don't ask me! Peppers If we're being specific, these are Chili Peppers, but Che just calls all of them "hot red food". These are Chilis, not Chiles, mind you; these grow in Méjico. Che's favorite are habaneros. Hammurabi, on the other hand, simply tolerates peppers; he prefers the condiment over the fruit, but even he'll admit that nothing beats chili sauce on an oven baked ground beef, cheese, and lettuce taco drizzled with sour cream. Okay, now even I am getting hungry! TL;DR Hammurabi likes bananas and Che likes Chile Peppers. Papayas "Pa-pie-uh", not "Pap-uh-yuh" as I pronounced it back when I was 7. The Papaya is, quite possibly, the very epitome of a tropical fruit; resembling an extended melon, the papaya has a greenish skin that hides a mouth-watering orange flesh and a colony of tiny black seeds. No, a papaya is not going to grow in your stomach if you eat the seeds; that's one of the most ridiculous things I have heard, second only to the Earth being flat. Che and Hammurabi both like them, although I'm pretty sure you'd rather not try Che's "Papaya French Fries". Yes, even you wouldn't like them, Ant. Pineapples I HAVE A PEN, I HAVE AN APPLE, UGH! APPLE PEN! I HAVE A PEN, I HAVE PINEAPPLE, UGH! PINEAPPLE PEN! APPLE PEN, PINEAPPLE PEN, UGH! PEN PINEAPPLE APPLE PEN! I HAVE AN APPLE, I HAVE A PINEAPPLE, UGH! APPLE PINEAPPLE! I HAVE A PEN, I HAVE A PEN, UGH! LONG PEN! Sorry, I couldn't help myself there. The Pineapple (pen) is a large juicy tropical fruit consisting of fragrant yellow flesh surrounded by a hard, segmented hide and topped with a hairdo made of firm leaves. Like the Papaya, both of them like it, but Hammurabi in particular likes crushing it between his hands and drinking all of the juice from the squeezed flesh. SpongeBob lives inside of a big gigantic one, which Hammurab is nice enough to not crush between his immensely sweaty, baboonish hands. Coconuts OOOH, OOOH, OOOH, OOOH! DOCTOR COCONUT, LOOK OUT, HERE HE COMES! DOCTOR COCONUT, LOOK OUT, HERE HE COMES! DOCTOR COCONUT! Okay that's enough lyric spam for today. The Coconut (or, as Che calls it, the Cocoanut) is a large, tough, ovaluar nut with a brown, fibrous, covering. Like all nuts, the coconut has a shell; but what is under it's shell? Spoiler alert for people who haven't been to Hawaii: the Coconut contains extra thicc white meat surrounding a central cavity filled with coconut water. Unlike what Hammurabi claims, coconut water is not actually milk; coconut milk is a generally accepted term for it, but it isn't coming out of a nipple, therefore coconut milk is not real milk... okay, things just got really weird. Moving on! Durians Have you heard of a durian? Probably not. Do you want to know what a durian is? Probably. A Durian is a large, green, spiked South-East Asian fruit. The durian is the size of a football; a handegg, not a futbol, mind you. It is considered a delicacy in South Eastern Asia, but to several who do not know it, it has a stomach-churning smell and a gooey consistency which are hard to tolerate for the unknowledgable. Despite its acird stench, it is highly valued for its flavor, which is about the same as a peach. Both Che and Hammurabi like to roast the seeds and eat them like nuts. Category:Blog posts